Saturday, November 20, 2010

An original bad ass

You may or may not know that I enjoy the game of texas hold em poker and if you have played the game for any amount of time you understand that it is not unusual to go a mind numbing amount of hands without being dealt crap. Nothing suited , connected , or god forbid paired. The kind of run that tempts a person to push all in with a 9-5 off-suit just because it's mathematically possible to make a straight. Or perhaps raise it up 8 times the big blind just because you haven't seen a card with a picture on it since you sat down. Poker players know. But i digress. It's during these runs that I find my mind wandering to odd places. Which I'm certain is directly related to chips leaving my stack . Here's an example.

During my latest bad run I began to wonder about certain seemingly simplistic things and how they came about. My mind immediately locked on to the horseshoe. Yes the horseshoe. ( don't ask me why ) And if you are a cowboy just stop reading now for this will surely be irritating. Now, I'm picturing the early domestication of the horse and trying in vain to contemplate the first genius that thought to themselves. " well lets see here I'm a human , I weigh about 180 pounds . I'm powerfully concerned about the condition this 2000 pound animals feet." ( By the way the idiot in my imagination has three teeth and wad of levi garret hangin out his pie hole.)   " I reckon the thing to do here is nail a piece of iron onto it's foot "

ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME ? It's a damn horse ! Horses in the wild don't have a store where they can pick up the latest steel kicks do they ? How did this happen for the first time ? Who the hell had the stones to try this ? I'm mean at some point in history  nobody had ever shoed a horse before. Is this why old westerns are filled with toothless drunks , because ol'betsy kicked em all in the face ?

Come on now it's one thing to try and ride a wild animal . I know every guy looks at moose and thinks to himself  " Bet I could ride it " But I'm fairly certain I don't know anybody who thinks they're bad enough to pick up it's foot and start hammering something into it. Now I know horses have hoofs and it's different but when you sit and think about it ............... it's the same.

Anyway I guess I  gotta give props where props are do. So here's to that first hard core , no nonsense , shaving with a snake , eating a cactus for breakfast , wipe his ass with rock , bad action , horseshoein sonofabitch. I'm sure he liked his whisky hot , his gun loaded and his women in a line. I'm sure there is a special place in man heaven for him. God rest his soul .

                                                     this has been a hapa  blap 

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